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Reclaiming my blog for me


Life has been a lot, man. I'm writing this in january, 2023, after a year and a half of getting dangerously close to a burnout, getting stuck in covid lockdown after lockdown, getting therapy, evolving as a person, setting new priorities, losing bits of myself and finding new ones. We've come a long way since I blogged daily, but I'm not at the point where I want to fully abandon this blog, this online diary of mine that I've kept for over ten years. It has been a creative outlet when I hated my job, a place to connect with like minded spirits, a way for me to hone my skills and challenge myself, and a means to convince others of what I had to offer. 

 
I'm still not sure if I'm a big fan of the switch from blogs to Instagram - things have become more superficial, more commercialized, more impermanent. But it doesn't have to be that way.  I just have to be aware of the fact that my blog is my blog. I don't have to blog for any audience, to answer to any sort of internalized set of expectations with regards to subject or frequency. Honestly, I second-guess myself too often, to a point where if I break my habit of frequent posts that "measure up" to whatever imagined benchmark I have in my mind, I feel like it's not worth blogging anymore at all. I want to get over that shit. And I want to reconnect with what made me excited with blogging in the first place. 

This lockdown has got me all introspective (sounds better than navelgaze-y), do you relate? I hope all of this gets me closer to me, though. If there's one goal I want to set myself, it's living authentically. As lame as that sounds.
 
I want to try writing in my mother tongue. I want to share outfits when I feel like it. I want to talk about my life. I want to use this space to start a conversation about the social justice issues that lie close to my heart.
 

So here goes nothing. Reclaiming my blog, bringing it back to what it was in the beginning. Something I did because I wanted to, leaving my own little mark on the digital world, for whoever happened to read it. 

Stay a while.

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